For over 20 years, Dave O'Connor has been a leading success coach to entrepreneurs, speakers, salespeople, consultants, and mission driven business owners. He's the co-founder of Mind Story Academy with his partner Carla Rieger. Dave's live and online trainings are ideal for individuals and organizations that want to open minds, increase sales, and maximize impact.
NOTE: Complete transcript available at the bottom of the page.
Screw The Commute Podcast Show Notes Episode 077
Internet Marketing Training Center – https://imtcva.org/
Higher Education Webinar – https://screwthecommute.com/webinars[02:01] Tom's introduction to Dave O'Connor [03:46] Had a J O B, unfortunately! [13:44] Making the transition to entrepreneurship [24:53] What Mind Story is all about [28:10] Visualization [30:06] The Richard Branson Affair [37:55] The best and worst parts of working for yourself [40:22] Sponsor message [41:35] A typical day for Dave and how he stays motivated [46:22] Parting thoughts for us Screwballs
Higher Education Webinar – It's the second webinar on the page: https://screwthecommute.com/webinars
Screw The Commute – https://screwthecommute.com/
Screw The Commute Podcast App – https://screwthecommute.com/app/
MindStory Academy – https://mindstoryacademy.com/
Free 7 Day Audio Course – https://mindstoryacademy.com/free-7-days/
Book Dave to Speak – https://mindstoryacademy.com/book-dave-to-speak/
Dave on Facebook – https://business.facebook.com/DaveOConnorpage/
Dave on LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/dave-o-connor-0940547/
Internet Marketing Training Center – https://imtcva.org/
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Episode 077 – Dave O’Connor
[00:00:09] Welcome to Screw the Commute. The entrepreneurial podcast dedicated to getting you out of the car and into the money, with your host, lifelong entrepreneur and multimillionaire, Tom Antion.
[00:00:24] Hey everybody it's Tom here with episode 77 of screw the commute podcast I got Dave O'Connor here and this guy speaks all around the world and he has a treasure trove of online trainings you'll hear about him in a minute. Hope you didn't miss episode 76 on chatbots. This was one of my Monday sessions where I do a deeper in a more in-depth training and chatbots are automated tools that help automate your sales and service for your customers and prospects and my little chatbot guy is named Screwy in honor of screw the commute podcast. So don't miss episode 76 go back and check it out if you missed it. All right. Our sponsor's the internet marketing Training Center of Virginia to distance learning school. But I want you to know do you. Or do you know what colleges and universities are doing. Well according to gradeinflation.com they're raising grade point averages to make it look like they're doing a better job of teaching when there's a mountain of evidence that says that they aren't. So I want you to watch the eye opening higher education webinar at screwthecommute.com/webinars or you can just go to screwthecommute.com and click on free webinars and you'll potentially save yourself and possibly your loved ones your friends and neighbors hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt when they go for higher education. But I got to tell you. Be prepared to be mad when you see some of the things these colleges and universities are doing to our youth.
[00:02:02] All right let's get to the main event. For over 20 years Dave O'Connor has been a leading success coach to entrepreneurs speakers salespeople consultants and mission driven business owners. He's the co-founder of mind story academy with his partner Carla Rieger. Dave's live and online trainings are ideal for individuals and organizations that want to open minds increase sales and maximize impact. Dave are you ready to screw. The commute. So Dave tell everybody what you've been doing lately.
[00:02:47] Hey Tom. So hey everyone. I am a speaker and a coach to entrepreneurs as Tom said speakers sales teams really teaching people how to keep their head in the game when the inevitable challenges setbacks and obstacles come up. And you know most of my business is online. I do a lot of speaking around the world and I sell a lot of online products. So it's in effect it's a laptop lifestyle which is awesome. That's what I designed for myself.
[00:03:13] Yeah well yeah. Every time we work together. You're like some different country Ireland UK don't know where you're going to be though you're in. But then you went all the way over to Hawaii. I think now that I'm talking for it right.
[00:03:27] Yeah yeah yeah. We're in Hawaii for a couple of months for the winter. Because hey you know the way it is too cold in Ireland or UK or too cold in Vancouver we normally live as well.
[00:03:36] Well the thing is though are you sure you're just not getting evicted everywhere. So every time I talk to you're somewhere else.
[00:03:42] Yes possibility. All right. All right.
[00:03:45] Now did you ever have a job.
[00:03:48] I did unfortunately. And it was many years ago and I worked in sales and selling health food supplements and I sucked at it by the way. I mean when I first joined this company they unanimously agreed Tom that I was the worst sales person that they had ever met. In fact I held a record for losing the most amount of sales of money sorry for this company for two years in a row.
[00:04:16] Well it's natural that you'd become a sales trainer.
[00:04:19] Yeah yeah exactly. I mean isn't that the thing where we most suck out is what really you have to get good at. Right. But after a couple of years I you know I really worked hard to turn that around at the same company you know I created this outrageous goal for myself Tom. I just said you know what I mean I suck I can't get much worse. So you know I'm gonna figure out how to outsell every person every sales person in this company added together.
[00:04:54] Did you tell them that or was this in your mind.
[00:04:57] No this was in my mind.
[00:04:58] Because I was going to say they'd probably give you a lot of crap over that.
[00:05:03] Yeah yeah yeah. Which is why I kept that to myself.
[00:05:06] All right. So you did it though right.
[00:05:08] I did it. A lot of hard work. Well it was a combination of you know a lot of these stuff that I now teach which is using more of your mind to overcome the fears of selling and you know I sucked as a speaker by the way so again I mean that was something that I had to really get good at and I failed forward there. I don't know if the audience can relate Tom but I mean I can remember where where I got that fear of public speaking on a seven year old kid back in Ireland. I have my first big role in my Christmas pantomime. And I'm so excited I'm practicing for weeks and I have two words that's all all I have to do is run out onto the stage and say larrio lee and toodle oo-clay.
[00:05:53] Well I think I'd of messed those up myself.
[00:05:58] Yeah yeah yeah yeah. So the big night comes on I'm so excited and I'm pumped because my my my folks are in the audience and you know my my my crush my Louise is there and you know time comes and I'm feeling something I never felt before I'm feeling this kind of knot in my stomach and my mouth is going dry I said What the hell is this. So I run out on the stage and I'm like a deer caught in the headlights. I literally forgot my lines and everybody is staring at me I don't know about that experience but man I just everyone laughed I ran off the stage my tail between my legs and then from that moment on Tom you know in my mind it was like speaking equals bad. You would rather die you know. So I had to literally work so hard to make a fool of myself over and over again be prepared to fail you know every time I think of even asking a question in an audience my heart would start to beat I become that seven year old kid again. But hey I overcame it with everything and all I know now with all the training that I learned and you know how to overcome fear how to overcome those limiting stories and yeah I ended up then being the best sales person this company ever seen.
[00:07:17] Well you know some people never get over that they have those traumatic experiences that I was even doing some research on that even a invasive surgery as a child can cause stage fright. And other things are common like your parents were telling you to sit down and shut up and wipe that stupid smile off your faces whatever you say is not important you know. So all those things contribute. So were there a particular things you did to overcome that.
[00:07:49] Yeah I did as many as many personal development seminars and trainings as I as I possibly could do. So I did some public speaking courses and you know but it came to the point you Tom where I had I had succeeded at a level that I wanted to in this company and I couldn't go any further. I mean my values you know are that I've got to feel on purpose which you know I somewhat did for a time I was there it's got to be fun. And I got to have that time freedom but I found that even though I was successful that I was working seven days a week and I was working pretty much all the time from early in the morning to late at night. I didn't have a moment myself. You know do you ever get like that.
[00:08:41] Well yeah I do that every day. Yeah I love it. But let me ask you. Were any of the people there that remember when you were the worst. How did they react as you started passing them up.
[00:08:59] Well the interesting thing is I mean I was the running joke every week right. I mean maybe initially you know reading out the the the sales results at the end of every week and it became a running joke and in last place we have oh guess who. Dave. It was it was so awesome to you know see the looks on their faces over and over again as my sales figures crept up as I passed one person after another after another and then as I outsold them all up together I mean there's nothing like I like to be able to prove them all wrong and be able to say you know what and I'll stick to two fingers up or whatever.
[00:09:40] That would be so much fun if that company be to hire you back now to teach them how to sell.
[00:09:46] Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah like the late great Steve Jobs right.
[00:09:49] Yeah so. So what was the next step after that.
[00:09:56] Well you know like I said I was I was working so frickin hard and you know I had this. I had this Alfa Romeo sprint back then. Tom Now I don't know if the audience knows the Alfa Romeo sprint. It's an Italian car. I wanted to car from Starsky and Hutch but the closest to my visualization was this Alfa Romeo sprint. So it looks great on the outside. And unfortunately I was working so much. It was falling apart on the inside. And it seemed like every single week a new warning sign would appear in the dashboard and what do you normally do Tom when the warning signs appear on on the dashboard.
[00:10:32] Ignore it.
[00:10:33] Yeah that that's what I did. I guess kept ignoring it and ignoring it.
[00:10:39] Was this a metaphor for your own life.
[00:10:41] This was a metaphor of my own life because I had this feeling you know what I mean I've done as much as I can now I have this dream of being a speaker I got his dream of being a success coach do what I'm doing now but I'm working seven days a week and I don't have any time freedom. So you know I'm kind of driving into work every morning and I'm feeling like this and all these warning signs are coming up and I'm ignoring them now I'm saying the usual Oh I'll do it next week I'll do it next week. Until one morning I'm driving in at the busiest time 9:00 a.m. I'm late as always and I'm driving towards one of the busiest roundabouts in Dublin. I'm seeing all the warning signs coming up and ignoring those and suddenly I'm speeding towards is round about and I mean I literally you know went to to put my foot on the brake and the brakes fail and I'm speeding towards this roundabout.
[00:11:42] And again I don't know if you've been ever in a situation Tom or it's literally a life threatening situation. I'm literally saying to myself Man this sucks what a dumb way to go. I mean that's the only. And what do you do. What do you do in those times. All I could do was was say well if this is it this is it. Let go. Not at the steering wheel now but I just said Oh OK. If it's to be used to be and you know it was like one of those movies Tom if if the heavens had opened up and I heard a sound of halleluyah it was like one of those moments where something else stepped in. I don't know what you want to call that for me is divine intervention. You know it seems like this thing has your back but you know for a few seconds which was a miracle it was no cars coming around that roundabout and I spun around that roundabout and I didn't hit anybody and then the car is yeah had the car just literally came to a stop. Naturally a few hundred meters down the road I pulled into the hard shoulder and you know what. I just burst out crying and I was a combination of a combination of relief you know I'm still alive an anger anger Tom because I literally was saying to myself wow you know why is this happening to me. And I had this voice come up inside me saying well you know because it is you you're not listening to the signs you know. And that was a turning point. You know I had to literally look at my whole life and say you know what I've been promised himself I'm gonna do this. And I had no choice but to do it so I set things into motion where you know I branched out on my own and that's another story.
[00:13:21] Well didn't those cars have emergency brakes.
[00:13:27] Alfa Romeo sprint Tom in in in Ireland right which is an Italian car you know which is kind like a sunny country Ireland not so sunny. You know your worst nightmare. So it wasn't smart.
[00:13:44] So you made this decision but you quit that day or did you save money. What did you do to make that transition.
[00:13:53] Yeah you know it took another. It took another few months but eventually I did leave and I can't say I saved money tom because I did what I advise people not to do. There was a certain point where I just literally jumped into the unknown and I wouldn't recommend people do that because I'd say hey you know what I think you should have enough money to cover yourself blah blah blah. But I mean I was great. I'd made some money but as great as spending it and some you know what I mean. Right. And I I guess I found myself in no man's land for next few months when I when I quit and it was scary right. It was one of the scariest times of my life because you know I let go of that security trapeze. You know that I'd call a job. And I don't know why this happens but it does. And I've heard it happen with other people but other things so many other things came to a head at that same time I was in a 10 year old relationship with the most wonderful woman and that all ended and you know it was like man what is happening. So what followed was a difficult time for me and because I had to find myself and I had no list. I had no contacts because people who I thought were my friends. Well I mean I just lost contact with a lot of the business contacts I had back then so I was starting from scratch all over again. I dunno if you ever been in that situation. And you know. But I did have a vision and I did believe in my message and I can remember this so clearly at the time I'm in the place that I was I was renting at the time and I'm standing in this this driveway that place and I can feel you know it's as if it happened yesterday all of the gravel beneath me and you know it is a beautiful view overlooking the sea but I'm in a bit of a mess and you know it was like a download of sorts I just had this.
[00:16:06] It was like a message epiphany whatever you want to call it. And it said something along the lines of I'm not sure why all this is happening at once. But one thing I know for sure everything happens for a reason a great good's gonna come from this and I'm gonna figure it out. You know I'm gonna turn things around. I've done it before. I'll do it again I'll bounce back bigger and better than ever. You know the best has still yet to come. And you know I went in there and I wrote it into my journal and everything. The very next day Tom out of the blue I get a call from one of my last remaining friends and colleagues from before and they said you know what Dave I want you to speak at my upcoming event. It's only a small personal development yoga group but I believe in your message. I've heard you speak before and I think you'd be great. Yeah. So you know often life throws you a bone right and then immediately there's this battle inside. You know I have the I have the excitement on one hand coming up and I got all these fears coming up on the others on the other side of things saying holy crap and you know this is exciting but what if I suck and you know what. And again the Science shows that right that as soon as you you get excited about a goal you get an opportunity that in a nanosecond you know you're going to get the feel good feelings the dopamine release but you're also gonna get the fear center call the amygdala and literally you know release the stress chemicals the cortisol.
[00:17:38] So how does battle immediately you know for me Tom like these these kind of a brain character is inside of my head. I often describe him like that. You ever have a voice an inner voice talking you out of your greatness and you know causing you to doubt yourself. Well that was there. So was kind of like this thing in my head going. Danger danger. You must not take this opportunity. We are on this course for mediocrity I've no idea why that that voice is German. But man I just had to trust. I just had to do what I knew best. Hold on to that vision. I started to mentally rehearse showing up at this event and you know delivering. You know I knocking it out of the park and delivering this great presentation that wowed people. And it was certainly interesting what happened next. I can tell you. I show up and my friend her name is Kate who organized the event. Says Come on in come on in and there wasn't a small group there. Tom there was five hundred freaking people and I'm saying I go look look there's all these you said it was a small group.
[00:18:53] She said Look Dave I knew you wouldn't show up. I said it was a small group. I said I can't do this Kate. She said it's too late I've already paid you. You know you have no choice. So I tell you Tom I was I ran into the toilet. I locked myself in there. I'm trying to do my Tony Robbins power move. You know I can do this I can do this I can do this and I'm that seven year old kid again I'm sweating profusely. My heart is beating Do you ever think you've got rid of something only to realize it's alive and kicking. Well that was exactly what happened and I couldn't shake this thing off. All the techniques that I had I couldn't shake this off because there was so much depended on it right. So there I am. I make my way backstage I'm a complete wreck I'm just a mess. And suddenly the emcee for the event is it starts to to you know describe who I am and it is it you literally the Emcee saying ladies and gentlemen wow we got a treat for you tonight. Dave O'Connor is going to blow your mind. He is an inspirational speaker. He's going to regale you with these stories he'll make you laugh you make you cry he's gonna blow your mind and he's gonna take your game to a whole new level and all the time I'm backstage so I get up on the stage again I'm that seven year old kid. I can feel the lights beaming down on me. My heart is beating. I'm like a deer caught in the headlights again. It seemed like an eternity. I can tell you and I'll tell you what happens next in a few minutes but hey I mean it was just it wasn't what you expect.
[00:20:37] Well at least you showed up on the stage thinking that all this big introduction and there's Dave running out the back door.
[00:20:43] I know but you know when. When the stakes are so high Tom. You know that I had I had made this leap from that old life. That was it was security and I had made this leap into the unknown because I thought about it for years and now here is an opportunity and it looked like I had failed before I begun. So what happened then was you know what seemed like an eternity. I literally you know again it was like because I'd mentally rehearse at night see all of this stuff that I knew to do. Suddenly kicked in it was like in a split second. Right. And I tell you what happened. I caught the eye of this young girl. You could have been more than 16 17 sitting in the front row with the audience right. It was like a split second. I had my eyes connected with with her eyes. I could see that there was fear in her eyes but I could also see there was hope there. And in that split second it just dawned on me you know what this. My God I'm making this about me. This is not about me. This is about that young girl. This is about this audience. And I'm here to serve and as soon as I focused away from my self-concerns and how I was doing and I focused outward on serving their needs then it was like that seven year old vanished.
[00:22:09] And the real me came forward and it was fascinating because everything that I'd seen in my visualization everything that I practiced it was exactly how I'd seen it in my mind. I was connecting with people you know. I was literally could watch people and see the stress melting away. I at one point it was like I'd hopped out of my body and I was observing myself giving the speech. It was that amazing. And then at the end of it. Wow. I mean I just had all these I had a standing O which I'd seen in my mind. I felt like I was completely on purpose that I had done exactly what I I came here to do and everybody came rushing up and saying that was amazing that was inspiring exactly what I'd seen in my visualization and my meditation and I had a couple of people saying hey you know what. I speak at this or I run this organization and love for you to speak at my group. And it was it was just one of those surreal magic moments.
[00:23:06] And you know I guess the the the message for me Tom was that you know when you just trust and you realize that you know what this thing called life or the universe whatever you want to call that want you to be here you've got to trust the wisdom of that. There is an order and a sequence of things and you know if you really focus on meeting people's needs if you don't make it about you then you decrease your self-doubt and anxiety whereas if you make it about you you increase your self-doubt and your anxiety you know. And I just kind of felt that I was there to be of service to add value and to move people to the next level. And it was just it was one of those magic moments in life really and it was a big turning point for me.
[00:23:55] Well it sounds like you had standing orgasm not a standing ovation.
[00:23:58] Yeah. Like the male version of When Harry Met Sally.
[00:24:04] Did this carry over to the speeches after that were the the. The crazy anxiety was gone. All of a sudden or still troublesome before speeches that you did after.
[00:24:20] Yeah. You know what. It was a gradual process where that became weaker over time I would say right where you know it's almost like it's it's like an addiction of some kind. It's almost like it's there to tempt you. But after a while you realize you know what. You know. Thanks for sharing. And I go oh you know what I mean I'm on a mission here and I've no time for a drama and I've certainly no time for this. So after a while it just it would the fear would vanish. And you know you'd still get the nervous excitement but that's a good thing.
[00:24:53] Yeah. So you know what I think you just did us you did right. You did a mind story on us. You know I think you did. So tell us about mind story. What is that. Is that the company is that what you teach. What is it.
[00:25:11] Yeah. That's the company that I run with my wonderful partner Carla Rieger. And you know like I said earlier we we teach people to overcome their stuff. And of course that comes in in so many different forms right. And you know we have this framework and we help people to put a positive message out in the world to overcome their limiting stories that again to research.
[00:25:40] And you mentioned there Tom I mean it can go all the way back to you know when you were a child you know kind of you know defense against these things but you know I always say to people and it's what we say in mind story there's for real things you need to know. Like if you're thinking about leaving your job and starting a business if you're wanting to be a better speaker if you want to be a better salesperson if you want to up your game then first of all you've got to get clarity. All right. So whenever I coach people for saying I always ask them is in the immortal words of the Spice Girls tell me what you want what you really want. And they go I'll tell you. Not at all but they normally will tell me something that maybe is other living someone else's dream. So you know you've got to get them clear on their own story and what they want to achieve and then you know the second part of that is commitment. You've got to be prepared to go all out you've got to be prepared to work your ass off but also to have the right mindset which we give people the mindset tools to be able to keep their head in the game you know because you have to have that momentum initially and then you got to have the courage of course. You've got to have that courage to be bold to go for it to seize the moment you know to put your message or your product out there into the world and you know those inner voices of self-sabotage will come up.
[00:26:55] But you've got to do what I suggested there push them aside you know and you've got to just feel that fear and even use that as fuel time to go for it anyway and then finally I think you've got to be consistent. You got to do it over and over and over again and man. I mean you know I know you talk about that and you know most people give up and you know too readily but I had an online program Tom I taught this program live and I put it online and I wanted to get it out there for ages and it just kept you and I just kept it on the shelf it was gathering dust and I was just afraid my message out there. But I kept I decided you know this has got to go out there and it was a program called 21 Days of Action. And we we give that to people in our mind story course. But after just keeping on keeping on those times when I'd have one person on a webinar when I'm promoting this thing eventually it just kicked in it's like the universe conspires ultimately to bring about your goals right. If you don't give up if you have that clarity you have that consistency that courage you have that commitment and that online program maybe hundreds of thousands of dollars and ninety seven dollar product because I kept with it.
[00:28:11] Now it sounds like one of the tools you used was visualization. I became a big believer in that with years and years ago I had a nightclub near a resort area in the lake and everybody always wanted to take me to the lake water skiing and then I came here and I couldn't even swim I actually wore two life jackets in case one malfunctioned was that they were 350 pounds and they're trying to pull me up with the boat and me getting an enema. But the boat wasn't powerful enough and I'm pulling fish outta my butt. But the last day of the season I got up and went about a mile down the lake. And that was the last day. And so I went back to the bar and over the course of the winner I was visualizing that I kept thinking about that the next day or not the next day the next season and next summer all the people came in from out of town and wanted to take me skiing again I got up the first time and went five miles down the lake and hadn't done anything any exercise. Nothing. Just visualized what that felt like. That whole time. So I'm really big proponent in that. But anyway that's that's a powerful tool is to Visualize where you want to be and that's I guess that's what you did when you went from the worst to the best sales. Right.
[00:29:38] Yeah. Well it's it's like the magic formula isn't Thomas the visualization plus the. The consistent and inspired action. And often you can take action but you don't have that mental component and a lot of people working hard you don't get results. There's a lot of people who kind of just visualize and you know they watch the secret 77 times and say hey wait how come my check hasn't arrived.
[00:30:04] Exactly like a visualization. Yeah. Anything crazy bizarre happened in your business life.
[00:30:11] Oh man yeah yeah. Lots of lots of bizarre things. Okay here's the story that comes to mind. And again it relates to the visualization as well. And this is back in 2004. I'm just getting going and things are just kind of taken off in the speaking and I'm starting to make some money and I see himself Wow. This stuff this stuff really works. This is awesome. You know I wonder what else I could apply it to. And I just said I just kind of said something crazy to myself and started visualizing I said you know who would most like to meet in the world. And I said to myself what I'd love to meet Richard Branson it's just one of those things I'd love to meet Branson. And you know so I started doing what I do every evening I do this visualization I write my journal I practice my gratitude and I just tag this little thing onto the end where I just visualize myself sitting down with Richard Branson were shooting the breeze with like two long lost friends. I did that for about two weeks and I had this feeling you know what. That's it it's out there if it happens it happens if it doesn't great now. So it's about six weeks later. My my then girlfriend came running into my office. She says hey guess what. Guess what we've been invited to this exclusive Virgin party and that was my only connection with Richard Branson. I flew Virgin. I said I checked in. I said Okay let's go. She said Branson not going to be there. I said no no let's go. So we went to a couple of weeks later and it was a typical you know U.K. overcast day. And this was a you know it's just a wild kind of thing you know because I just read recently this Fortune magazine and on it was was a picture of Branson on Necker Island and I said the man who is everything he has the island he has the business and then tongue and cheek to journalists had damn him.
[00:31:56] And I said wow I'd love to connect with him. And sure enough Branson was there. Right. But there was also hundreds and hundreds of other people there. And when we were you know it was made clear to us in no uncertain terms nobody gets to talk to Branson. So my girlfriend she looks at me and said you know you heard that right. And I kind of raise my eyes up and said Yeah yeah yeah. But in my mind I'm kind of thinking you know what. This is a sign so that the day goes on and sure enough nobody was getting near this guy. He'd been whisked to one meeting to another. He had his entourage around him and his bodyguards around him. And so I said to myself Tom I said you know what. It's not meant to be this time round. Maybe another time. And then I just had this feeling this is like this voice inside saying Hey it ain't over till it's over. So there was one hour left in in this in this event and by the way it was it was a lavish affair. There was rock bands playing and all that kind of stuff you know. And it was like another scene out of another movie right where I had to do a double take as I looked and I looked again and then 20 feet away there was Branson sitting eating with his plastic knife and fork as was all these kind of you know a little kind of outdoor eating areas. And it was no one around him.
[00:33:14] And I think to myself oh my girlfriend looks at me and says no not no. And I said you know what. One of Richard Branson secrets his boldness I happen to know this. I think he'd be very disappointed if I didn't give this a shot. So I start to make my way towards him. He's about 20 feet away like I say I take the first five steps Tom. It was like a scene out of Mission Impossible like I'm literally I can you know I'm just expecting those bodyguards to come out of nowhere I'm gonna take it nobody comes. He doesn't see me he's not come up for air. This guy right. He's hungry. I move closer. Another five feet and then again the amygdala comes in. I said thanks for sharing but you know you get there. You know what out of here and I'm five feet away and I can literally hear the sound of the grass crunching beneath my feet. And again he hasn't seen me so I go. Nothing. I go again louder.
[00:34:21] And he looks up he supposedly slams is knife and fork on the table and he looks up at me right with the most intense stare. If you ever thought someone had x ray vision and they were scanning you right like the Terminator I can't I can't I was taken aback and I kind of go sheepishly because there's one thing Tom right to actually ask for something and visualize something and then you're gonna get the opportunity right. But it's the question is whether you're gonna seize the moment and actually do something with it. Oh this could be like a disaster. Or it could be life changing. So he looks at me again for what seems like an eternity. And I kind of go at Mr Branson. Big fan. Just wondering if we could have a chat for a few minutes. Again he's looking at me he's looking at me and then I get I don't know if it was just that he saw something of me in him but he's lightened up and he said Sure. Have a seat. And you know what Tom we had. We sat and we chatted for forty five minutes. Wow. See exactly what I'd seen in my visualization where I'd shoot the breeze and he's saying oh you're a motivational speaker. You know the fascinating thing about something like that I was you know the way you can meet certain kind of people that you're enamored with are heroes of yours and you hope that they're not you know you know that well you hope that there is a hero you think they are right.
[00:35:49] And he was every bit like that. He was I was amazed he was completely focused on me and it wasn't about him. He was telling me everything I wanted to know. Tell me all the secrets you know. And at the end of it he says oh and this motivational speaking teach me something. And I did one of the exercise be doing my own story now and it wasn't called out back then with him back then. And then he says so so can I keep in touch can I actually send you can I get your email address. I want to send you some of my best secrets. Now I'm kind of thinking yeah yeah. Think about that. Yeah. Thanks so much. You know it was just it was one of those again moments that were life changing reaffirming everything that I was doing. And again just like a scene from movie Tom that was it. I mean after we shook hands we took pictures and Dan his entourage comes and they whisk him off to his helicopter and he flies away and that was how I met Branson. Well how bizarre is that.
[00:36:56] Yeah a lot of good lessons there too because you visualized it but then you took those 20 steps to get it.
[00:37:03] Yeah. You always take that was one of his points which is interesting you know. He's one of those books which is you know obviously in line what would you do. You screwed a commute. He is was Screw it just do it right. I wrote a journey a thousand steps begins with that first step. The interesting thing was you know if you analyze my mindset there was a visualization but then there was also that stated detachment. So I was ok if it happened and then I was ok if it didn't happen and then I was looking for the opportunity to seize the moment and boldly jump in and go for it which which I thankfully I did despite my inner committee's attempts to hold really off track.
[00:37:38] Yeah know also that that's what you call it. That's what I call it negative selling yourself right. Yeah don't like desperate they can smell the you know so you just don't care either way. Then you can get the job done. So that's another good lesson though. What do you like most about working for yourself. What's the worst part.
[00:38:00] That's a great question. What I love working about myself where the money is great because I get to keep a lot of it. And that gives me the time freedom for me it's the time freedom though you know like I said you know I'm recording this from Hawaii we're here for the winter you know to be able to do what I'm doing with you here now Tom. On the laptop and a lot of my my work and Carla's work and what we do in my story is online. So that is for me the best we can go and immerse ourselves in these cultures enjoy just being there but also do the work that we love. And you know for me that's it's the freedom of all of that. The worst part is that you know in any business it has its ups and downs. I mean thank God it's going great right now. You know but it has its ups and downs it means it's exciting when you're winning but it sure sucks when you're on a downward spiral. Right. So again you're really having to practice what you preach and you're really having to you know hold on to that vision and do what you're telling people to do. So I think that's the the the worst part of it really.
[00:39:07] So how do people see some of your courses.
[00:39:10] Well I got a free gift. I'd like to give and just for your audience Tom I am. I mentioned that 21 day audio program earlier. Well I've created a seven day you know best of of that course free for people listening to this podcast. So it's for anyone if you if you know you're tired of stopping and starting your business over and over again if you struggle like any kind of structure to your day if you find yourself procrastinating on important tasks and projects and you got a fear of sales change failure then if you'd like a fresh start you want the latest mindset tools to use those fears as fuel. Then I have this seven day audio program that I think you'll find awesome.
[00:39:54] Where do they find it.
[00:39:56] Go to mindstoryacademy.com/free-7-days.
[00:39:57] And we'll have it in the show notes. So all they have to do is click on it. That's that's great. That's super great bonus. Now go take a break. Responsible when we come back we are going to ask Dave What's the typical day look like for him. I'm afraid to hear that answer and how he stays motivated. All right folks are sponsors the internet marketing training center of Virginia the distance learning school which teaches legitimate techniques to make a great living either working for someone else or starting your own online business or both. You can check it out at IMTCVA.org. And I also don't want you to get robbed in you or your family's higher education quest. So be sure to watch the Higher Education webinar at screwthecommute.com. Just click on free webinars. You can also download the audio version of the webinar just in case you want to check it out on the go. Keep in mind just because it's in Virginia it's distance learning so you can be anywhere in the world and take classes and it's asynchronous which means you don't have to be there at a certain time. So it's really convenient to get this high level training.
[00:41:35] Now let's get back to our great guest today. It's Dave O'Connor. He travels the world speaking and he's got online courses out the wahzoo. I think that's an Irish term. So tell us what's a typical day look like for you Dave. What time do you get up do you work out with. What's that look like.
[00:42:00] Absolutely. You know first thing in the morning Tom practicing what I preach. I do my 30 40 minutes of inner work so I'm doing the visualization and you know enjoying the meditation and listening to inspirational and motivational stuff. You know I love listen to your stuff Tom and I've been a big fan for years and I love how a personal development junkie. I'm writing in my journal and I'm getting clear on the the priority actions I write those in my journal as well. So I have about five to seven priority actions that will move the needle. You know these are the the activities that are going to move everything that we want forward. So I'm not getting caught up in the busy being busy stuff. I mean generally six thirty to seven but I tend to again go to go to sleep around a 12 12 13. But I do believe that we have to get the quality of sleep is everything. So I think that even with a meditation and everything that really helps you know I do a workout. You know I love to go to the gym I love to do those quick workouts.
[00:43:13] I feel the mind is key there as well because I make sure I'm focusing on the muscles I'm working on sometimes in the morning and sometimes it could be mid-morning or could be afternoon depending on if I have a coaching client or not.
[00:43:27] You do a lot of travel and do you might have to do stuff in hotels to work out.
[00:43:31] Yeah. Well you know when we travel we always we always look for you know a place that number one has great Internet. And you know it's it's a place where we got our own office space and we prepare to kind of have more of a condo than a hotel. But yeah I mean we always close to a gym as well. And that's important because again I find it gives me energy and after that morning routine then I'll tend to only only then Tom I started checking e-mail right. And I dive into what we need to do and what I need to do for the day. So that might be getting on with a coaching client it might be doing a Facebook live to many of the audience I have around the world. I might record some videos. I'll always take a few mind breaks during the day. So here now in Hawaii. Twice a day at least I go for a walk on the beach and really just be as mindful and present as I can and that's awesome. And then we'll always have quality time myself and Carla in the evening. I refuse to stay online. And you know for about 90 minutes before before sleep. So yeah. But it tends to be you know action packed but in a good way Tom I mean it's so awesome just to to have designed the lifestyle I feel so grateful to be able to go anywhere in the world. I mean we've been to places for three months like Bali or Thailand and you know just just just doing this work.
[00:45:05] A true lifestyle business for sure. Now I actually live near the beach but I avoid the beach because I get really upset when all the whaler ships go by and start throwing harpoons at me. Now how do you stay motivated. You're a Mr. motivator how do you stay motivated.
[00:45:29] Yeah I am Mr. motivator. You know I do a lot of these mind story kind of blueprints for people and people often say to me you've done thousands of these things you not get bored and honestly no because everyone's different. We tried to change it up. If there is you know times when I kind of feel you know what I'm kind of feeling that I need more excitement and more motivation here I always go back Tom to that time when I was struggling in life. Now I have many of those times as Many people in the audience have you know like for example when I hosted webinar where no one show up in a webinar when I was down out so down and out that I had to borrow my mom's credit card to book a flight from Ireland to the UK to hold my first seminar in the UK and only one person showed up. You know I meant those times so I go back there and it just keeps it real.
[00:46:23] So any parting thought for people out there that want to get into a lifestyle business like yours. We call them screwballs the people that listen to this.
[00:46:34] To succeed you gotta you gotta get out of your comfort zone you got gotta you know as Jobs once said be a little crazy here's the crazy ones here's a screwball my message I guess would be Tom I see so many people dabbling and you got to get serious with a certain point where you know this thing called self-sabotage or these fears or self-doubts you know they're not playing games and when you think about you know that the level of trickery that goes on where we trick ourselves out of our greatness and talk ourselves out of our greatness self-sabotage is playing to kill it wants to kill our dreams self-sabotage wants to make sure that you don't secure your children's future wants to make sure that your family don't eat.
[00:47:23] And my attitude is well you've got to be at least as committed to those self-sabotaging thoughts and fears are to ruining your life. You've got to be as committed to making your dream a reality. And then I would just say Tom just take it one step at a time take it one day at a time you know it's important to have the big dreams but it's perfectly okay to start small and you know to take that one step at a time like we talked about earlier and to start to get some momentum going in your business and your life.
[00:47:59] Those are great words. Dave I know you've helped literally tens of thousands of people around the world with those kinds of words and your courses and so forth. So I want to thank you for coming on today. I know we're going to hear from Carla about a month or so from now yes people will be looking forward to that and also what's the name of the freebie you gave them.
[00:48:23] Ok. So it's mindstoryacademy.com/free-7-days.
[00:48:35] And that's an audio course. They can listen when they're on the run when they're driving. There's no meditation in it right where they're going to wreck the car.
[00:48:49] There is but there's there's a there's a warning comes with a warning at the start. OK. So there's going to be seven days where you can literally put those on like it listen to this podcast and drive along and enter it's gonna be some closed process has to go along with that which you do not use for obvious reasons like Tom just said when you're driving your car.
[00:49:08] Well you know I do have an instrument rating for flying an airplane where you can't see outside. So that's just like driving a car into a roundabout.
[00:49:22] Yeah. Do not do my trick of hurtling towards the roundabout a high speed without the brakes.
[00:49:27] I'm going to call that Alfa Romeo company and say you know you to put emergency brakes on those cars. Oh yes start with brakes.
[00:49:38] Thanks so much and for those you listening this has been episode 77 of screw the commute podcast the show notes will be screwthecommute.com/77 and please go over to iTunes and leave us a review and a star rating it really helps the show out and we will see you all on the next episode.
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