387 - Turn ADHD into a Superpower: Tom interviews Ben Sklivas - Screw The Commute

387 – Turn ADHD into a Superpower: Tom interviews Ben Sklivas

Ben Sklivas is coming to us from Montreal, Quebec. He's a 27 year old entrepreneur that has worked through adversity both in personal and his professional life. Ben speaks on how he changed his outlook on ADHD from being less than normal, to utilizing it as a superpower in everyday life.

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Screw The Commute Podcast Show Notes Episode 387

How To Automate Your Businesshttps://screwthecommute.com/automatefree/

entrepreneurship distance learning school, home based business, lifestyle business

Internet Marketing Training Centerhttps://imtcva.org/

Higher Education Webinarhttps://screwthecommute.com/webinars

[04:30] Tom's introduction to Ben Sklivas

[12:18] Bullied for being different and finding passion as an Entrepreneur

[16:13] Learning curves of students with ADHD

[20:08] Doing speaking engagements

[22:18] Sponsor message

[24:16] A typical day for Ben and how he stays motivated

Entrepreneurial Resources Mentioned in This Podcast

Higher Education Webinarhttps://screwthecommute.com/webinars

Screw The Commutehttps://screwthecommute.com/

entrepreneurship distance learning school, home based business, lifestyle business

Screw The Commute Podcast Apphttps://screwthecommute.com/app/

College Ripoff Quizhttps://imtcva.org/quiz

Know a young person for our Youth Episode Series? Send an email to Tom! – orders@antion.com

Have a Roku box? Find Tom's Public Speaking Channel there!https://channelstore.roku.com/details/267358/the-public-speaking-channel

How To Automate Your Businesshttps://screwthecommute.com/automatefree/

Internet Marketing Retreat and Joint Venture Programhttps://greatinternetmarketingtraining.com/

Ben's websitehttps://www.boost.am/

LinkedInhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/benjamin-sklivas-6878b0140/

Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/bensklivas/

Internet Marketing Training Centerhttps://imtcva.org/

Related Episodes

Bekkah and Ruthie – https://screwthecommute.com/386/

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Episode 387 – Ben Sklivas
[00:00:09] Welcome to Screw the Commute. The entrepreneurial podcast dedicated to getting you out of the car and into the money, with your host, lifelong entrepreneur and multimillionaire, Tom Antion.

[00:00:24] Hey, everybody it's Tom here with episode three hundred and eighty seven of Screw the commute podcast. I'm here with Ben Sklivas, and I wanted this guy on because many of us suffer from, well, I'd say the shiny object syndrome. And we're all over the place as if we had ADHD. Well, he does have ADHD and he has turned it into a super power. And I thought it'd be a great example of how you can turn something that everybody considers bad into something really, really good. So he's going to be very inspirational for you.

[00:00:58] Hope you didn't miss Episode 386. It was Bekkah and Ruthie. I'll tell you what, these entrepreneurial sisters have a podcast called Business Talk Sister Gawk, and they're just cute and fun and funny. And they give everybody a nickname. They called me Ham buoyant, I guess a ham that's flamboyant. I don't know what they meant by that, but that's what they gave me. So how would you like to hear your own voice here on Screw the Commute? Well, if the show has helped you out at all in your business or giving you an idea to help you start a business, we want to hear about it because it's screwthecommute.com and look for a little blue sidebar that says send a voicemail, click on it, talk into your phone or computer and tell me how the show has helped you and also put your website in there so I can give you a big shout out in your own voice on a future episode of Screw the Commute. Now, while you're over there, pick up a copy of our podcast app at screwthecommute.com/app. You put us on your cell phone and tablet, take us with you on the road and we got complete training on how to use it. And also you got to get a copy of our Automation eBook.

[00:02:13] We sell this book for 27 bucks, but it's yours free for listening to the show. And just one of the tips. One of the tips. This is not hyperbole. This is not exaggeration. We kind of estimate and figured it out. One of the tips has saved me seven and a half million keystrokes, saved me carpal tunnel syndrome and just makes my business go lightning fast and reduces your workload, all that stuff. So grab a copy of that at screwthecommute.com/automatefree. All right. People are still freaking out with the pandemic, but myself and my students aren't because we know how to sell from home. And I've been doing it for 24 years. And what is it? No. Twenty seven years now, since 1994, since the commercial Internet started and about twelve must have been about fifteen years ago, I decided to jump into the field of higher education and I have the only licensed dedicated Internet marketing school in the country, probably the world and its teachers, hard core skills that are in high demand everywhere. Every business on Earth needs email marketing and text marketing and chat boards and blogs and everything else that goes along with it. So this is what we teach. It's not four years of partying like our guests did at the biggest party school in Canada.

[00:03:47] But it's no big debt involved and you can we have people making money before they, you know, a couple of months into the school because people need these skills and they like young people to be able to do it. So we have business people in there and we have young people in there. In fact, one guy joined my mentor program, got a scholarship to the school, gifted it to his daughter, and she's making 6000 dollars a month as a side hustle after only four months in the school. So this is very powerful. Check it out at Imtech, vague. And a little bit later, I'll tell you how you can get a scholarship that you could either use yourself or gift to someone in in your life.

[00:04:30] All right. Let's get to the main event. Ben Sklivas is coming to us from Montreal, Quebec. And I got slapped one time up there, by the way, I can tell you about that later. And he's a 27 year old entrepreneur that has worked through adversity both in personal and his professional life. Ben, I don't know if we'll see if he goes by Ben or Benjamin speaks on how he changed his outlook on ADHD from being less than normal to utilizing it as a superpower in everyday life. Ben, are you ready to screw? The commute?

[00:05:06] The stigmatization of ADHD, actually, but thank you so much for that introduction and honestly, I do want to hear about that story that you're telling about you getting slapped and feel like that can be a really good time for everybody. Well, thank you. Thank you again.

[00:05:25] Now, do you want to go by Ben or Benjamin?

[00:05:27] I just want to say that's a good question. I mean, Ben for simplicity reasons, Benjamin for professional reasons.

[00:05:34] I'm simple minded, so we'll just use Ben. But OK. So anyway, I'm trying to every time, you know, I've spoken in like 12 countries around the world and I try to say something in their language, you know, just be nice. And and so I said something to a woman that I thought I was saying, thank you very much.

[00:05:56] Like, merci beaucoup. Something like that. But but I said merci. Merci something. Which was like, thanks for your nice ass or something.

[00:06:03] Nobody will tell me exactly what the stories are.

[00:06:09] So that's what happened. So. So I'm glad to meet you. We met on a podcast site and when I saw your story, I thought I got to have this guy on because a lot of people really I mean, not even diagnosed as ADHD. There's just so much so many things coming at them as an entrepreneur that you could develop ADHD just because of it. But you were actually diagnosed with it.

[00:06:34] I think you said you were dyslexic. And in the. So tell us a little bit about oh, and this one part really kind of hit me. You were the dumb, illiterate, hyper inattentive, distracted one of the group. So please tell us tell us about your your path, what you're doing now.

[00:06:54] And then we'll go through all the way you got got here.

[00:06:58] Yeah. Great. All right. So to give you a little bit more of a, you know, explanation, breakdown as to who I am and what I do and where I'm currently at now, since that's the direction that we're going to take. I work for a company called Accelerated Marketing. We are at the, you know, one of the established marketing companies in Montreal. We've worked with over fifty two thousand clients, all of which have ranged from startups all the way to Fortune 500 companies. It's since its incubation boost really is aimed to work to get the most out of brands, really to help them achieve the goal. And because of that, because of that peer to peer relationship that we try to maintain and create, it's given us one 100 percent success rate with getting all of our clients a positive ROI and overall reaching the goals that they brought to the table when first initially talking to us.

[00:07:52] And what do you do there?

[00:07:54] Yeah, that's a really good question. I currently, by definition, I am the director of business development, so I'm trying to create these tangible relationships with our clients to create that long term value that we can bring to them in over. We usually have the average lifespan of a client are around five years, but I've seen it go higher and it's really the direction that I'm trying to take. And the reason that I got brought on is because I, I had this new vision in this new outlook on life that I'm really trying to bring to both Boost and my own personal brand. So because of that, I joined the group that we were chatting about earlier. And I really try I'm really trying to get in front of the people that matter to bring the most value to the people that are being affected during covid.

[00:08:43] Now, are you are you the traffic junkie? Is that your nickname or moniker or what where that come from?

[00:08:50] Well, so to give you a little bit of a breakdown, Traffic Junkie is the company that I got scouted to out of university. So to give you a little bit more of a breakdown, I'm in my final year of university. I really wanted to get a job in the corporate world. I wanted to be one of those corporate sharks that, you know, everyone is talking about, which we hate on this show.

[00:09:13] I might I am on your side right now. So I really I had dead set in my mind that I was going to be that corporate guy, you know, that shark, this suit and tie wearing suit kind of guy, you know.

[00:09:26] And so I got scouted out of university to go work for a company called Traffic Junkie, which is a subsidiary company of mine, geek, who you and your audience may know as PornHub, Brazzers, all of that good stuff, right?

[00:09:42] Well, I would never know about what that meant. Yeah, I'm to know, of course. Yeah. No, it's impossible. I've even heard of such a thing.

[00:09:51] Yeah, I agree. I was in the same boat. So Traffic Junkie is the advertising platform for PornHub and its subsidiary companies.

[00:09:59] And honestly, it gave me a really good in-depth look as to what being in the corporate life really meant.

[00:10:06] What it meant and how to act and who to who to befriend and who to not befriend, and I realized that after a couple after around a year and a half, I really started to feel less motivated going into work.

[00:10:22] I was I was feeling this nostalgic of my university years and not because it's a number one party school. So we're just going to throw that one out. But because we're overall overall, it was making me feel like I wasn't giving back enough.

[00:10:36] So I felt like it was time to quit. But I did get fired.

[00:10:42] So that was OK. That's the best thing that could happen for many.

[00:10:48] You know, most people most people say, I mean, I've been around a long time. Most people say it was the best thing that ever happened to them when they when they got fired.

[00:10:57] So. So is it mean that if A plus B will see you got technically fired from PornHub.

[00:11:06] Oh, one hundred percent got fired. You didn't perform? I did not perform.

[00:11:12] I was I was I was there for a very short amount of time, but I did it really hard for the first couple of years.

[00:11:18] Yeah. Yeah, sure it is. No short is no good. I mean size does matter to the motion of the ocean. Come on, let's go. Now, here's the thing.

[00:11:28] And I'm not folks, I'm not bashing or promoting porn. All right? But when I first started my first geek and first of all, a lot of the things we used today were invented by the porn industry, by the way. Very much so. And the first geek that I had that was helping me with websites back in the mid 90s got a job out of Canada, I might add, and he was paid one hundred thousand dollars a year. And all he did was negotiate credit card rates to try to give a quarter or a tenth of a percent less, which I think at the time his the conglomerate was doing four hundred thousand dollars a day. Yes. So there's a lot of money and that's probably not as much nowadays. But but anyway. OK, so but did you ever believe that you'd be the director of anything when you were getting bullied and kicked around in school and told you were stupid?

[00:12:28] I didn't even think I was going to pass high school. To be completely honest, I. I was I didn't really think much of myself. You know, it's it's a really hard thing to realize that you're you go through life and you're told you're not good enough or you're not going to make it or, you know, you have a reading level and you versity of, let's say, a 12th grader, you know, and it's demoralizing. It makes you feel like it makes you feel like you're not up to par to the rest of the world.

[00:12:58] And well, no know that nowadays, Ben, you'd be a genius if you had a 12th grade reading level, the way they're turning out kids nowadays.

[00:13:07] I agree. Right. So I think of Mice and Men is enough for me. So I'm good.

[00:13:15] So. Yeah. So how did you turn the corner? I mean, did you have an inspiration in your life? Did you get some divine intervention? How did you overcome being beat down like that?

[00:13:27] I think what it was I think it was the fact that I when I when I went to university, I had I had a year prior to university, I had visited and lived in France and I was alone on my own, to my thoughts, to my ideas. And a couple of months to a year later, my my mom calls me. Right. And she says, what's happening? Right. So my my trip is supposed to be three months. And I was there for way longer. I was enjoying myself way too much. So I she calls me and she says, I want you back. You haven't finished anything other than high school. And I said, and I start pondering and I start thinking of French class in high school. And I said, man, I was always so fond of my French teacher. So many stories that he gave, you know, about university and about having fun and the friends you make in the networks. Right. And he went to certificate's. So Snowpacks is a very small knit community of students in Nova Scotia, a small, remote community called Antigonish.

[00:14:30] And I was thinking and I decided that it was time for me to go to university. Right. And and I had all this time on my own. And as I go to university, I realized this is a lot harder than high school. No longer we are no longer in the realm of easy right. And high school is difficult for me, like being young, difficult. I was scraping by on sixty and so I finally I finally get into marketing and I start experiencing what it's like to actually test myself and push myself to notes that I've never reached. And so I tried here and there what started some startups with some friends, marketing firms working around with locals and really creating a little bit of a black book of, quote unquote clientele in a town of three thousand people. So I look at myself and I see myself after second year and I'm on the verge of breaking down for the hundredth time. And I, I decide that now is now is a make or break moment.

[00:15:35] And I decided that I was going to give it my all, stop partying as much and really go deep into who I was and really what motivates me to be the person that I am. And I think that was the reason that was the moment in time where I started realizing the importance of of self-worth and really pushing yourself and trying to test those limits and trying to break through the barriers of of of all of the I'm going to call it PTSD of of of comments and and bullying in high school and elementary school. So I think that because of that, it really shaped me and really pushed me to be the person that I was.

[00:16:13] And I understand there's there's been quite a few dark moments. I mean, I was reading about you that you you actually cried yourself to sleep over some of the sometimes.

[00:16:24] Yeah, of course. How could you not when when you feel like you're not worth anybody's time or you're not worth a job or you feel like you're literally going nowhere in life, you're looking yourself and you're crying because you're trying, you try so hard to make these things happen. And I remember so vividly when I like a couple of stories. For example, I was I was studying for my last my last exam.

[00:16:48] And I I know my faults and I realize how bad I am at written exams. I stopped. I'm going to be completely transparent about it. You're dyslexic and so. Yeah, very much so, and I can say that now with confidence. And so I, I wouldn't I would have sixty five seventy on a good day in written exams, but I had a class in marketing that was pure, that was one hundred percent weighted on presentation, and I absolutely killed it.

[00:17:23] So me and my group had a ninety eight at the end of the year just because of this one, this one presentation that we made. So I realized that it's not about it's not that I'm bad or I'm different or all of the different different words and and things that you can describe for people with ADHD. It's just that I learn differently. I am I am different. And it's not that I'm bad at everything. It's just that I'm very good at other things. So I've always had issues trying to trying to forget about my weaknesses. And I think that now, more so than ever, it's not that I have to forget about the weaknesses, but it's I have to focus less on the weaknesses as a as who I am and focus more on the things that I'm really good at and utilize those four to create more of a brand for myself, as well as creating really long term lifelong connections, values and creating and growing a tribe of people that understand a where I'm coming from. B, the type of journey that I've gotten through and see the fact that I'm still trying. And I understand that it's not something I'm always going to get right. And and by law, you know, humans make mistakes. And and I think that especially for people with ADHD, it's really hard to focus on the positive because of the lack of dopamine that we have in our brains. So because of that lack of dopamine, it's really hard for us to feel accomplished by something, thus making it why we have such a scatterbrain and impulsivity and irregularities about certain things. So I feel like.

[00:19:02] Because of going through those trial and error periods in the times where I cried myself to sleep, I failed. Right, right. I applied to one hundred different jobs and I didn't get one answer back. And and I and I get fired from jobs because I'm talking too much. I'm too impulsive or I'm too this and I'm too that. And I think that rather than use rather than thinking about it as something negative, it's something that I'm not able to control.

[00:19:24] Why not take control of the positives in my life and what I'm good at? So like I said, and I think this is the reason that you and I are on a podcast right now, it's the fact that I'm utilizing those strengths. A one of my strengths, reaching out to people being annoying. You know, I think that is me in a nutshell. So utilizing those to create lifelong relationships is really something that has helped me get over it. And honestly, a lot of therapy, a lot of therapy.

[00:19:53] So thank you. Thank you, Dennis. You're great.

[00:19:57] Well, you're not you're not annoying me right now, but I could see how I could get to that point.

[00:20:05] I agree completely. So so on the same side. Right.

[00:20:09] So you do speaking engagements, right? Because that's one of your strengths.

[00:20:12] Yeah, I do. I do. I do. And it's something that I'm really trying to put myself towards and really trying to get more into that now, you know, like so for example, for a lot of you that don't understand what business development is, it's a lot of prospecting, a lot of going after individuals. Right.

[00:20:28] And trying to to pitch them value of some sorts. But I always thought of like, why do I need to pitch them value on something? Why can't I pitch them myself? Why can't I be myself? And then if they see a fit, then we can work together.

[00:20:42] So I think that I think that it's working together is really the most important thing.

[00:20:49] Well, I'm not sure if you're aware of it or not, since we just met that I've trained more professional speakers than anybody living so. So and it's something I have experience with.

[00:20:59] So, for example, I was in this class of branding, right. It's beside five fifty one or something ridiculous number like that. Right.

[00:21:09] And so my, my professor knew about my ADHD and he was teaching at other at a high school for four kids with ADHD, which is literally where I went to school. I went to school in one of those types, you know, Centennial Academy for ADHD and dyslexic kids. And and I as soon as he told me that he wanted me to speak at that school, I instantaneously broke down. I don't even know why I just started bawling right now. And I said, this is an opportunity. This is a time where I can help kids get, like get past what they're feeling right now because I went through it and I would do anything to make somebody feel like they're not they're not alone, you know? And and so I think that's the direction I want to take right now is really speaking more and and discussing more and really having these, quote unquote, person to person conversations where I can express who I am, what I am, who I'm helping and how I'm helping them, rather than just copy pasting the same the same paragraph so you can send it in a note, in a LinkedIn message and just switch out a couple of words. I feel like it's a lot more beneficial.

[00:22:18] That's beautiful. Beautiful. So I think a response or break. When we come back, we'll ask Ben how what a typical day looks like for him and how he stays motivated. So, folks, about twenty two years ago, it kind of turned the Internet marketing guru world on its head. And the guys at my level were charged in 50 or 100 thousand bucks to to teach what they knew. And I knew a lot of these people. You give them that kind of money, they'd be hiding out in Quebec, you know, to do and never help you. So so I kind of made them all mad and that I started charging an entry fee that was like ten times smaller. And then my success was tied to their success.

[00:23:02] So they loved that because they knew I wouldn't disappear on them. And for me to get my fifty thousand, they had to make two hundred thousand well seventeen hundred students plus later is still going strong after 20 some years. And it's extremely unique in that you have an immersion weekend that the great Internet marketing retreat center in Virginia Beach, you shoot videos in my TV studio, you get a scholarship to the school I told you about earlier, which you can either use yourself for extra training or would be the best legacy gift you could ever give to a young person in your life. And it's all one on one. We don't do any group training because, you know, if you're if you're in a group, you know, the the people, the advanced people are bored and the beginners are lost. So, no, we don't we can't make good progress that way. So it's all one on one. We'll even take care. Take over your screen, show you where to click, where not to click. And it's been the most successful, longest running. Most unique program ever in this field, so check it out at greatInternetmarketingtraining.com and again, you get a scholarship to the school if you're in my mentor program. So check it out and give me a call.

[00:24:16] Let's get back to the main event. Ben Sklivas is here from Montreal, Canada is a twenty seven year old guy that's overcome a perceived deficiency and turned it into a superpower. So, Ben, what's a typical day look like for you?

[00:24:35] Oh, God, I am overtly, especially in the morning. And you can ask any one of my friends. I have copy paste in the same schedule for the last I would say five years now.

[00:24:48] So minute by minute, I'm up at six o'clock in the morning and I'm up at six o'clock in the morning. And as soon as I wake up, I'm I make breakfast. I journal in my plethora of journals. Right. And after that I do yoga and then I meditate. And then once I'm done my meditation, I do my affirmations, my greatest, my gratitude journal. And then I get grinding and I, I work from 9:00 to whenever the date is. So whenever the time is during the day that I feel like I've done enough to finally say OK today, now I'm done, now I can have a glass of wine and then we can move forward.

[00:25:30] So no matter what time you go to bed, you still get up sharp at 6:00 every single day.

[00:25:36] Ok, without and honestly, I wish it was different, but at this point in time, even without an alarm, I'm still up at the crack of dawn. So I feel like if anything, it makes me feel like I'm doing a lot more right. I'm a big morning person, so I really strive in the morning comparatively to nighttime where I've been a bartender and I've been a waiter and so on and so forth. But, you know, at this point in time, eleven, thirty twelve. I'm KOed done in bed, ready.

[00:26:08] So that's pretty interesting.

[00:26:10] It's exactly the same every day. That's the you're the first person in all of these episodes that said that. I mean, many, many people and it's you know, it's big nowadays having a morning routine quote.

[00:26:22] But you really have a routine, that's for sure. But that's because a lot of people. So in case you didn't know, a lot of people with ADHD are tend to work a lot better when their schedules. So not only time blocking, but allocating time towards the things that matter. So, like, I like like a lot of people, it's when you're scheduled, it makes you accountable for your actions. And I find a kind of accountability. One of the biggest things for me, because when you're accountable, it means that you're liable for something that you don't do or you're praised for the things that you do do. So I think that I think that the routine that I have is is really a lot of positive in my life. But at the same time, I know it's a little bit excessive. I get it.

[00:27:07] Ok, so what happens if you get a dog?

[00:27:10] Oh, my God.

[00:27:11] So the really funny thing about that is that my ex-girlfriend really wanted a dog and I was ready, but I had a cat named Rocky and he is more than enough for me right now. That is consistent. Meowing So I'm sorry if you hear a little backdrop of this little bugger, but, oh, we like animals on this show.

[00:27:32] We rescue animals. And I have two German shepherds looking at me right now.

[00:27:36] That's what I did. I got my I got Rockie. It was serendipitous moment, I would like to say. And it was really I was looking for I have a therapy animal, so Rocky's a therapy cat.

[00:27:47] Also, the rocket can go to the bathroom in a litter box and the very good let out to mess up your routine.

[00:27:56] Exactly. But you wouldn't even understand the kind of the kind of annoyance that comes from this cat. When I'm trying to meditate, it's like I tried focusing on doing nothing. When you have a cat begging for food.

[00:28:09] God, yeah. Oh, I would.

[00:28:12] I would I wouldn't think any other thing about it, though. I would never I would never go about it. No regret.

[00:28:16] So how do you stay motivated.

[00:28:19] Well, honestly, like so I as of recently I think I starting twenty twenty one is running when I really got the motivation that I needed.

[00:28:28] And, and so like I told you, I got fired from PornHub and I think you're also the only guest that could claim that.

[00:28:38] I'm going to be honest, I was distracted. I didn't know where I wanted to go. So I got fired from PornHub and I got fired quick. And and from there I was I just I felt lost. I felt unmotivated by any thought of work in general. Right. Overall, I was sinking and I had no life jacket for somebody to bring me back. And then, you know, and then I realized I had to change. That was a catalyst to bringing me forward, so I got back, I got back and I got back to doing what I was supposed to do, and I felt like there was a there was a plethora of things that were just waiting on me and so much so much guilt for not being in what I thought I was going to be. And so I was no longer in the corporate world and I was hating myself for it. Right. And I was in a rut. And Mark Elliott, the CEO of Boost, came and literally what felt like a lifeline was thrown to me. And and because of that, I, I can say now that I'm a lot more motivated in my work because I feel like I'm actually giving back.

[00:29:39] And I like I said, twenty, twenty one is all about people helping people. Right. And for me personally, I think that twenty, twenty one is about growing my network, growing the community, growing with people and helping people that were in the same situation as me, that were lost, that were unmotivated, that didn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. And it took me a long time and a lot of inward thinking and inward persevere, perseverance and really trying to get over the hurdles of what my weaknesses were and how how I am supposed to not focus on these weaknesses and focus on the positive, because that is an issue with a lot of people. It is finding that motivation and finding that value that you can bring. Right. Because everyone says, oh, yeah, you're going places. You're going places. Right. But how how how are you supposed to believe what other people say when you don't feel any love for yourself or any type of motivation to even get out of bed? So I got this lifeline from Mark Elliott.

[00:30:40] And then he told me, he said he said, you know, I have a really good feeling about this.

[00:30:46] And two days later, I, I broke up with my my girlfriend broke up with me and I was in this pit. And so I was in his pit and I was talking to Mark Elliott and I was asking, what can I do? How can I do it? And I brought on a company that I didn't expect to be anything. So it's a it's a random it's a random company. But I have an idea. So I'm technically not talking about it, but so I had Company X. Let's call it Company X, then turned into five days later, turned into the biggest company that boosters ever had in their in their career. So not only was it my biggest fail, but it was the biggest sale of the company. So that that really made me think, oh, yeah, I'm going in the right direction. I think I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. And I didn't even sell them. I didn't pitch them. I didn't sell them. I just said, look, I have an I have something that I would really like to talk to you about.

[00:31:42] I know that you do X, Y, Z, really well. And I really think that you're doing great for yourself. And and honestly, I was just genuinely happy for I'm genuinely proud of where he came and where he where he got the drive to get to where he was. And I started realizing the more genuine I am and the less copy paste I am, the more people will want to engage with me, the more people want to talk to me, the more people will want to listen to what I have to say, because I came from this place and I and I finished at Trafficjunkie, thinking I'm not good at what I do.

[00:32:17] That's the reason I got fired. That's the reason that I'm not going to be hired again. And then I close this deal and everything changed. My outlook on life changed. I started engaging on LinkedIn. I started speaking more. I started going to some it's more I started reaching out to the Tom, to the Tom and to that end and to the VA all around to the podcast and to the speakers. And I have new goals that I want to set. And it's really it's life changing. And honestly, it makes me wake up in the morning thinking that I actually can do it, because I'm going to be honest here. I have made a lot of mistakes and I've hit the shit hard, like I've hit the ground. And and I've I've been I've been at points in my life where I feel like I was in such a rut, in such a hole that I literally couldn't see outwards. And and I think that because of the fact that I've I've I've hit the ground so many times and because of the fact that I've messed up there it is up. He brought me a toy. That's great. And so I really got to a point where I could say that I'm genuinely motivated by what I do because I see it in my client's eyes. I see it in the eyes of the people that that that I reach with my community, my friends, my family, all of that. So I think that I'm at where I'm at in regards to motivation, because of the the the work that I've put myself through and the emotions that I felt. And really the I started visualizing a lot more. I started visualizing myself positively. I started looking at myself positively. And it took a lot of work to get past. The fact that I hated myself, right, or I hated I thought I hated myself, but in reality, I'm my biggest fan. I love hearing myself talk. I love doing this, this and this. And I and I love it. And I love being honest about my faults and then being accountable for them as well.

[00:34:17] Well, thank God you didn't commit suicide because, you know, there's been a lot of that with young people lately and and probably went through some of the same things you did and unfortunately went the other direction.

[00:34:30] But I got to tell on you a little bit here, folks. I know you aren't going to believe it. This is Ben's first podcast interview. Oh, yeah. He's not a virgin anymore, so thank God. So thanks so much for coming on, man. It's very inspiring. Did a great job, you know, telling your story.

[00:34:50] And I'm sure it it it's ringing a bell with a lot of people out there that have been knocked down and told that they're not any good. And and how you climbed out of it is is really great.

[00:35:02] And and if we can boil this down to one really important thing, it seems to me that I could I could put this size that.

[00:35:12] Pornhub can be motivating, so I totally agree with you. It was it was the catalyst to bring me to where I was.

[00:35:24] So I don't like to to say that things I don't like to think that things don't happen for a reason.

[00:35:30] Right. I went to PornHub thinking I was supposed to be corporate. I came out, I came out of PornHub thinking corporate is definitely not the way for me, not made to be a sheep. I need to be a leader. So I really want to connect with as many people as possible. So reach out if you have and really tell people if it's shit, man, tell people how to get hold of you. Yeah.

[00:35:51] So LinkedIn, LinkedIn is really great. I'm on LinkedIn all the time. Clubhouse if you have it guys. Like let's get on that. And honestly, I just got my Instagram back. I did a social media cleanse and I finally think that I'm able to use Instagram and other social media platforms in the way that I need to rather than using it as external stimulation.

[00:36:12] So add me at Ben Sklivas. Right. I get it.

[00:36:21] And and honestly, I'm really waiting and looking forward to talk to everybody. Thank you so much, Tom for everything. And I really look forward to if potentially there's another podcast and really the direction of twenty, twenty one.

[00:36:33] Awesome. Thanks for coming on man. So everybody really that's was very inspiring here in his story.

[00:36:39] That's why I wanted him to have to be on here to to to let you know the darkest days, there's sunshine if you keep after it and work hard, keep going after it. All right everybody, we'll catch y'all on the next episode. See ya later.

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